She went to the ocean that day. She felt the wind and the space but she didn’t feel like it belonged to her anymore. She felt like the space occupied by her own being was the heaviest thing on the shore. She imagined what it would be like to be the vastness of the ocean -- to not feel like a constant spiral of tightness.
They kept telling her to focus on the here and now
But the here and now did not feel tangible to her, anymore.
She breathed in. She breathed out. There was not relief. Where was the sun that promised warmth?